In Transition

Things I do not know:
How our money will hold up once my husband begins his program,
How I will handle not being in classes for a whole year,
How to help my best friend heal her broken heart...again,
How to make sure my daughter learns to write and count with her "issues",
How to make the choice to hold her back a grade or send her on,
How to keep the neighbors dogs from using our yard as a potty,
How to relax,
How to breathe deeply,
How not to gain anymore weight with 12 weeks left in pregnancy,
(the cookies are so good),
How to stay out of the yard area at Lowes.

Things I know:
We will be ok, We will be ok, We will be ok...better than ok actually but for now I have to tell myself "ok".

Inside my Head Today

Invisible weight

so hard to carry

Visible weight

leads to more invisible weight

Quiet solitude with

people all around

Singing in the car

to myself

No phone calls

only bills in the mail

Working

for way too little

Still here in this house

not home anymore

Desire for sleep

although I obtained plenty

Urge to be alone

the want for only myself

Depression

takes me in waves

Comes back

undulating with chemicals

Leaves me gasping for freedom

at times

Leaves me happy inside my head

at times

Must try to remain as normal

as possible

At least as normal

as I ussually am

My definition of normal

is blurred

Maybe it's not me

just the dictionary